OFFLANE AXE GUIDE
Do you hate big words and reading? Do you like to run at people and fight them because you’re a giant red angry degenerate? If so, you’re in the right place! I would write more but words are for losers.
Method Acting
In order to improve at Axe we will be using a technique known as Method Acting. The key to Method acting is pretending and embodying the figure you which to impersonate. For example, Heath Ledger learned to method act as Joker by dressing up as a clown and beating up people who maintain bat sanctuaries.
To improve as an Axe player, you need to know the strengths and weaknesses of the hero inside and out. To truly master Axe, you must become the Axe.
Step 1: Get Jacked Biceps
Axe needs no team because his biceps are seriously ripped. You’ll want to consume as much protein as humanly possible while benching like a mad man. Just keep working that Iron until you are incapable of reading because your brains have been replaced with muscles.
Step 2: Get 12 pack abs
Axe is a cut above because Axe is one cut mother fucker. Keep doing ab workouts until you look like you are straight out of a 300 casting call. ALSO DON’T SKIP LEG DAY YOU DEADBEAT.
Step 3: Do insane cardio
Axe wants to fight, which means being able to take some hits. Make sure you have the cardio to keep going because rest is for the dead!
Step 4: Paint yourself red
BECAUSE REASONS
Step 5: Go down to the local boxing club and fight everyone
It’s a good day to fight, so go fight! Go to the gym all in red and demand to fight. Remember to yell very loudly like axe to make everyone want to fight you!
Step 6: When in the ring, finish off your opponents with your signature culling blade smash!
Boxing is a very technical sport. This is because you need to keep punching your opponents until you win! When Axe is done he jumps in the air and whacks his opponents on the head and then does it over and over again! It is very important you master this jumping whacking maneuver.
Step 7: Queue for a Dota 2 match.
Into war’s teeth!
Step 8: Drive to your teammate’s house and beat them up.
Axe is the only reinforcement this army needs!
Step 9: AXE
Now you are ready to 1v5 the entire enemy team as Axe.
